December 06, 2004  
Well my lungs are well and truly fucked. I seriosly think it is Pleurisy. An inflammation of the pleura, the lining of the lungs, with subsequent pain.
This is the summary:

Pleurisy may develop in the presence of lung inflammation (pneumonia, tuberculosis), rheumatic diseases, chest trauma, certain cancers, and asbestos-related disease. The main symptom is pain over the chest wall at the site of the inflammation. In some circumstances, the pain may be felt in the shoulder.
The pain is increased by deep breathing, coughing, and chest movement. The normally smooth pleural surfaces -- now roughened by inflammation -- rub together with each breath, and may produce a rough, grating sound called a "friction rub". This can be heard with the stethoscope or an ear held against the patient's chest.Fluid often accumulates at the site of pleural inflammation. A localized collection of fluid separates the lung pleura from the chest wall pleura, causing the chest pain to disappear even though the illness may be worsening.
Large accumulations of fluid compromise breathing and may cause coughing, shortness of breath with rapid breathing (tachypnea), cyanosis, and retractions

Argh! How scary!!!
I woke up at 3 last night and started crying. I felt really bad, cuz I woke up Jo, and he had to work at 8:30 the next day.. plus his back can't handle my bed. Its really old and crap, and my back's probably stuffed from it, but I just don't realise. But my lungs are just plain FUCKED. There's a sharp pain in the top, and the bottom and it hurts every time I even slightly stretch, or hug someone, or cough, or just for no real reason. I really have to stop smoking. You'd think I wouldn't want to do it, because of the obvious health factors involved, but... I'm addicted. It's who I am. And I hate it. But I need it. *sigh*

Melton was fun. Cass's party went off. It was good seeing her again, but more so seeing people I used to know from Youth Group, when I went years ago. Only one of them still goes, and we've all changed quite alot. There was free frozen cocktails, so I stocked up on Bourbon and Cola for the night, but stopped drinking at about 12, maybe one. The family and close friends had all spent ages setting up everything, all the tents/marquees, a Karaoke set up, and hundreds of fairy lights all around. They hird a frozen drink maker and organised the party really well. Because it was all set up in the one back yard, people, like myself wanted to go to sleep at some reasonable hour, like 2 or 3. Which is fairly rough, but hey, I'm a party person. Anyway, I was sobering up pretty quickly and couldn't sleep until atleast 5 o'clock, when finally, Cass and her boyfriend STOPPED singing Karaoke.
The cops came and everyone did a fashion parade showing what there were. A few different things that people were included Witch, Wizard, Woodnymph, Western Bulldog (one mascot, and two girly players) Warrior, Waiter, Waitress, White Rabbit and... yeah some others. But it was all in all a good time. My ex and my boyfriend got along really well, and thats what I wanted. Plus, Gemma is ALWAYS fun to party with. She's completely nuts that girl.
Anyway, my lungs are still really bad, and I'm getting really worried. However I did get a lot closer to Jo, and thats always great.

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